Sunday, July 12, 2009

What wrong w all my family member? They were making me go insane!


I've tried my v.best to make Mummy forgive me once again, but i failed to, instead our relationship are becoming worst!
I've tried my v.best not to hate Sis, but the more she did, the more i hete her seriously, i always post blog to post out my feeling, but now i don't even have feeling, idk how to express out too.


I don't dare to tell Bi what happen to me, he will get v.angry
I don't dare to cried infront of Bi, He will go mad & wan beat this beat that
I don't to cry infront of dumb when i meet her, I scare she cry too.
I don't dare to tell anyone my feeling, I scare nobody understand how i feel.
I don't dare to hug meimei & tell her, instead i'm making her hate my sis&mum even more.


Worst, i don't even have th mood to do my homework, my heart were not there. what happen to the strong girl Jolee that precious used to mention? Going mad soon, they are driving me crazy.


Mummy, when are you going to stop writting? You want forever like this? I know you dislike hankuan but no matter what he is my boyfriend, if you want me break w hankuan, why not you break with your bouncer first? He were nothing beter too, when i walk pass his car i really wanted to distory his f.car! You were the one who so unreasonable now, not me, i already tried my best to talk to you, be your good girl le, i know i failed to, cos what ever i did you still not happy unless i break w hankuan. I know he was at fault too, he should not beat me in th first place, but all this were misunderstanding right! When dad hit you, in th end you also gave him so many chance! You are making me really go crazy! Because of family i can't even study!


Joanne, you already knows mummy liddat nobody talk to me at home, yet you fucker! never even come home, when im down, im lost who were the ones talk to me? I'm always alone in th room, facing th wall hugging my pillow hearing song & cried. When i saw you i f.hate you, hate you throw me aside, hate you never even do your part as a jie, hate you dump me aside, hate you so much! Hate you push all the housework giv me do when i'm having so much homework to complete, im not like you! you din even study, what you did was to pei hoho. I gave you attitude, scold you, you tell hoho, when hoho come he gave me attitude, he diao me, he shoot me i get f.dulan already never scold you all back le, at least im v.good alright! Hankuan get f.mad when i tell him, i even please him don't do anything to you & hoho, what bout you all? I don't want so many conflict between you me, hoho & hankuan that why i tried to stop everything, you? Mummy makes me headaches le, you were another one, i already decided le, f.care you, with or without you i still can live better, don't come home better, when i saw you i scare i might now control my temper & give you attitude, & your lanjiao attitude always use beat de. == ! Go away from my sight alright, the more i saw you th more i hate you! home is so peaceful without you now!


Crying* sigh, i really really really don't know what to do anymore, i may smile i may laugh but when im alone i always cry :( Family suck, why after years & years this f.family problem always happen to me! Why not others!

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